It's Been The Best Week Ever

It's been a big week.

Naomi Campbell attacked her assistant, a leprechaun took over the internet, Wilmer Valderamma spilled the beans, Kevin Smith called Reese Witherspoon a C-you-next-tuesday, we saw how cracked-out Whitney really is, and Fergie's boyfriend went into hiding. And that's just the beginning!

Tune in to VH1 tonight at 11 and all weekend long for a brand new episode of Best Week Ever. And for your viewing pleasure, straight from the editing room, we have this week's Best Drinking Game Ever for you. Ready?

When  you're watching the show, drink* everytime you hear a reference made to a woman's... um... hoo ha. You know. That Sharon Stone part. Got it? Okay, so there you have it. Enjoy the show.

*by drink we mean a non-alcoholic beverage, of course. i mean, we would never endorse binge drinking. no. of course not. unless you're buying.

Real World: Podunk?

Look, I will always watch the Real World, whether it takes place on a tropical island or in a bunker in Libya. But I can't help noticing, the cities they're basing the shows in are getting less and less, well, cool.

Paris, San Francisco, New York, Hawaii. There was a time when people wanted to get on the show just to live in a really cool place. But somewhere around Boston or even Chicago, the locations lost their "wow" factor. And then came Philadelphia. I'm sure it's a great place if you're born and raised there, but in spite of its Liberty Bell, it's not a mecca for youthful discovery. And as pretty as Key West must be, when Jimmy Buffett is a town's biggest star, it doesn't bode well for young urban hipsters.

But now for the breaking news: next season of the Real World will reportedly take place on the campus of Lake Superior State University in Michigan! Is this some kind of joke? I'm sure northern Michigan is beautiful, but I'm positive the moose population out-numbers humans 5 to 1. Nevertheless as long there's booze, jocks and a hot tub, I will always be a humble servant of the Real World.

(in the meantime check out gratuitous pics of the Key West crew at a recent Miami fashion show after the jump)

Meanwhile, the cast of Key West are enjoying their newfound fame, now that they've been released in the real real world. Here they are at a fashion show in for Miami's Ocean Drive magazine.

 

SIZZLER: Paris Hilton, The Documentary?

According to Miami Herald blogger Leslie Abravnal, some one is making a documentary on the one and only Paris Hilton . The uber-heiress was spotted at Miami's Opium nightclub on stage. She "commanded the microphone and did shout outs to all her friends in the crowd. As she did that, a camera crew captured every moment for her next dreadful project--a documentary on her life. "

That's the only information we have so far. But if this documentary is anything like her sex tape, it will expose more about the state of the nation than Farenheit 911 and the Fog of War combined.

Celebrate Your Wonder Showzen

Tonight is the premiere episode of the second season of MTV2's genius comedy program Wonder Showzen.  If you're not already watching this, you're missing one of the funniest, most subversive and just...wrong shows ever created.  Here's an appetizer:

Are Big Mistakes Having The Best Week Ever?

I think they are. Here are three examples why:

1) Keanu Reeves took a break from thinking just long enough to throw out this gem. Here's what he learned while filming a rape scene with Hilary Swank: "that some of the ladies don't mind it... Hah, that's awful to say."

2) Danny Glover plans on appearing at an early-evening news conference tonight with Cynthia McKinney, the Georgia congresswoman who punched a police officer. What are the first two words that pop into your head when you think of Danny Glover? They're Lethal Weapon, aren't they? Probably not the best person to have by your side when you're awaiting assault charges...

3) Basic Instinct 2. I'm no expert, but I'd say that when 71 of 77 reviews on Rotten Tomatoes.com, are negative, the movie could prooooobably be classified as a mistake. In fact, I think that seals the deal: mistakes are having the best week ever.

You Cannot Petition Hot Topic With Prayer

There is an issue that is burning up the petition circuit. No, I'm not talking about puppy mills, though that is an excellent cause. I'm talking about Hot Topic, the only place for "young men and women between the ages of 12 and 22 who are passionate about rock music, pop culture and music-inspired fashion" to shop. What is the problem with Hot Topic? That depends on who you ask. It's either too goth, not punk enough, not in enough places, essential to San Francisco teens, or not in Australia. Before you decided which petition to sign, read the argument for each one after the jump...

• Hot Topic should be a bit less goth: A lot of people are afraid to step into Hot Topic because of the way it looks. I personaly think that's a little bit wierd, but those people have a point, in a way. all of the stores and black and red and look like a cross between emo and goth. They could make it a little bit less goth, don't you think? This update was added to the petition statement on September 30th, 2005 at 7:45 pm I am NOT afriad to go into Hot Topic!! You guys are missing the point. I'm saying OTHER PEOPLE are afraid, not me. I've gotten a shirt or two there, so I'm not afriad to go in the store. Other people are. Not me. Get it??
• hot topic should be everywere: hey i love your store1 i just think that it shoudnt be found in the mall make it like a wal mart you know just have store in the middle of town so what if people hate it you might sell more product. my mom wont take me to the mall at all she hates the traffic she gets lost and all this other stuff. well build a hot topic just like across the street of a wal mart or somthing i dont know just make it found in more places than the mall.(it would also be nice if the prices were lowered a bit
• boycott HOT TOPIC: any one in pensacola florida area knows it hot topic is the dumbing of america selling "punk" shit but isnt punk supsoed to be anti-mainstreem ideas and thinking for yourself not shopping at a store called HOT TOPIC just listen to the name hot topic, usualy the hot topic is the cool thing to do so...
• SAVE HOT TOPIC!: My mall wants to frikin SHUT DOWN HOT TOPIC. They say itz cause it offends people. Well offend my ass, where else can I buy all the crap i need and wear on a daily basis?????? what about all of the kids that need hot topic? it is the only location within 57 miles, and if your car is in da shop for da 2nd time you need to get there within a couple hours!!!! i don't care who you are. if you want hot topic to be available to like 30,000 teens in a suburb of san francisco, sign this...!
• Bring "Hot Topic" down to Australia: BRING HOT TOPIC TO AUSTRALIA...!!

I think I'm going to sign "boycott HOT TOPIC" but only because I think dELiA*s rules!

The Daily Danza

If you saw a homeless person on the street wearing a birthday hat and rapping to pigeon you'd think: that dude's crazy. But what about when Tony Danza does it?

The Friday Five

We're gonna mix things up a little this week instead of doing our usual iPod shuffle.  My friend Lindsay got me thinking about an interesting question - which songs make good cell phone ringers?  Selecting a song that doesn't make you sound like a total lame-o every time your phone rings is harder than it sounds.  You want it to say something about you, but not TOO MUCH.  You want it to be a cool song, but not TOO COOL.  Silly, but not TOO SILLY.  You have to like it enough to hear it over and over again.  And no matter what, never EVER be the guy with the Maroon 5 ringer.

Here are five that I came up with (all chosen from the options available to me through my cellphone service):

"Hard Fo' a Pimp" by DJay - This is probably the greatest ringtone in the history of the form.  I have it as my ringtone and you should too.  No, wait.
"Let's Get It On" by Marvin Gaye - Classic, timeless, and just a little sleazy.  Everything a ringtone should be.
"Hate It or Love It" by The Game - Use this catchy tune in leiu of being the bajillionth person to have "In Da Club".
"Loser" by Beck - This is a very meta choice in that the song is about a being a loser and having this song for your ringtone is a little loser-ish, thereby fulfilling the song's own message as it's playing.  Wrap your brain around THAT.
"Surround Me" by Scott Stapp - Having this as your ringtone shows people that you're tough and not afraid to fight.

FOUND IN THE CLASSIFIEDS

Click to enlarge.

American Idol Rejection Isn't So Bad

With most reality shows once you're time's up, you're pretty much handed your walking papers and kicked to the curb. But if you're kicked off American Idol, you're practically treated like a king.

According to TMZ.com: after the remaining 'Idols' say goodbye to their comrade, the rejected 'Idol' is immediately taken into a private room, in which a psychologist and an 'Idol' management rep are present. No one is allowed to enter while certain issues are addressed -- the rejected 'Idol's' feelings, what he or she can and can not talk about, what that person can and can not do, and what responsibilities they have now that they're off the show. 

If that weren't enough, the remaining cast takes the rejected contestant out for a family-style Italian dinner. 

All the salad and breadsticks I want? And a free shrink? Kevin Covais hit the jackpot.