Friday Morning Quick Hits

Captain Kirk demands Rick Berman be exiled to Ceti Alpha V.

Eminem in Rehab;  Dr. Dre says, "Slim Shady, you a basehead."

Xena the Warrior Princess to visit Battlestar Galactica. Fanboys weeping in ecstasy currently unavailable for comment

Nude Jude, hardly a prude, screwed by crude pics that rudely intrude and prove his lewd dude was not in the mood.

Lois Lane protests against the war in Iraq.  By... becoming a US citizen?

U.S. Customs computers crash at airports after being hit by worm, forcing highly trained TSA employees to process travelers by hand, including Irish tourist Ben Laden O'sama.

Aliens prefer to use advanced technology to help a guy with a farmer's tan get laid.